Leave it Alone and Live in Grace.

Mercedes Sosa's voice fills the air. Ripe and full. Round. I dream of Guatemala. I dream of tropical plants and warm smells. I'm unpacking and creating my home, my living space.  I've found the red paper mache toucan in a box I've unpacked, and I hang him over the edge of the stair well. A surprise, a smile.

The sun is shining as bright as it will get this time of year... the windows are open. PTT is painting the front door blue. We are in sync. The house is peaceful, at ease.

I'm unpacking books, wishing that the assembly of the bookshelves would go more smoothly, and yet enjoying the process of laying out the books in categories the signify the range of my interests. I'm fond of books the way I am fond of old friends, memories that make me feel secure, warm, inspired, alive.

I'm hanging the baubles in my life. Its part of settling in for me. Hanging things that twirl and swing. Adding a sense of enchantment. Whimsy. Old necklaces, colored glass strung on a string. Bells. Memories that thread a  ribbon of continuity to my days on earth.

I've recently become enchanted with paper cranes. Origami paper cranes. I want to have people in the house make 100 of them and for each bird, they should make a wish. I'd like to string four strands of 25 each for Christmas. Make a list of 100 wishes. Memories to come.

AGT is here, on her way to Harlan and Marie's w/ her brothers. Not very talkative today. I have a hard time making peace with it. I think the kids are too aloof. Not very friendly as a rule. It makes me sad.

 I'll tell her about the crane project later. I secretly hope she'll be into it. Maybe she and a girlfriend will sit around the table and make a bunch of them. Maybe.

 Nothing personal. That's how it is, isn't it? I've been thinking about this concept since visiting w/ KH last evening.and thinking of how we talked in depth about the tension between staying and leaving. Sick of the fight, yearning for the higher meadow, -greener as in are we looking for the greener pasture, the greener side of the fence? Ha!

The koan is, of course: how do we fully feel the pain and accept the truth it reveals of not being in a partnership that fulfills our most primal desire for deep connection?
Don't take it personally.

Leave it alone. Leave ourselves alone. Take care of what we can, say no when we need to and don't worry about the rest of it.  Act from wisdom. Remember that we can't count on what we've previously learned isn't reliable. Celebrate what works, move around what doesn't.

PTT calls up the stairs... "oh by the way, thanksgiving is off." "Greta has invited HC & AGT and FT & Chelsea for thanksgiving."

I wonder why its ok to blow off their father. It's bad manners. Its unkind to PTT.

Ah well. What can we do? Don't take it personally. Step into the day with love and make our own fun. No worries. They'll come back and it will be ok.

Back to the peace cranes. They seem like a sweet way to practice living in grace.

How to make a origami crane video.