I Feel Joyful!

"Perhaps surprisingly, another important aspect of equanimity is joy. Recognizing the joy of equanimity goes against the common view that equanimity is dry, unemotional, and somewhat aloof. For the Buddha, however, mature, equanimity is linked with a deep and sometimes subtle joy and happiness, characteristic of a (relative) freedom of mind and heart. Joy naturally arises, the Buddha tells us, when we no longer are hooked by what is agreeable or disagreeable in experience. As we work through our attachments and aversions, we become more and more "purified and bright, malleable, wieldy, and radiant," "peaceful" and "sublime". (pg.173, The Engaged Spiritual Life, Donald Rothberg

My journey is starting to reflect this wisdom. I resonate with it so. I've been on fire with life recently. Bringing order; speaking out -strong and from my heart. Standing down fear. Practicing compassion and patience as consciousness allows. 

PT and I have been lingering longer is present moment together. Practicing intentional kindness, or rather, intentionally reflecting what is real for each of us. It seems that loving-kindness is more evident. There are still drunken, confused evenings. I still notice alienation and fear of abandonment. I still notice "flight" thinking. I'm starting to think that its more of a drill, a practice session, a recognition that things can change, and that I may need to be nimble, familiar with the nod to get going at some future time. But, more and more, I see myself engaged in my work now -alive, creative and not needing PT's affection as a primer for my life to flow. I am flowing. And, its because I'm practicing letting go. I'm actively practicing equanimity. "When we are no longer hooked by what is agreeable or disagreeable in experience, we experience joy." I feel joyful! 

 And with that - I'm off to hike on the island with my joyful, loving canines!!