Without food, how then shall I celebrate the snoday?

Sno Day! Its so amazing to be here, at this desk, looking out on this amazing view.  Peace is settling in around me. Why not?
I keep giggling when I look out the window. I can't help it. My god! The world outside out windows is beautiful. Deeply, satisfyingly beautiful.

I thought to myself.... wow! its a snoday, and so what should I bake? What should I prepare? Deep woodsy, smoky soups? Cookies? Something special to celebrate the day.

And then, I stopped. If I'm changing the way I relate to my life, where food is not the pivotal point from which everything I do rotates... then, how is it that I shall celebrate the day? The snoday? What essence, what emotion am I experiencing and how shall I go about my life? What is it about the sno day that is rich and fabulous? Going out into it! The adventure of it!


I tell AGT that over the past three weeks, I've eaten much, much better than before. I'm thinking about that in context of being abstinent and what exactly is success? I can claim success 4 or 5 days a week over the past three weeks. How does one measure improvement? By what scale do I look at this monster called addiction?

So what have I done to celebrate the day? Healthy lunch.... yogurt, banana, peanutbutter, an orange. A few dates. A handful of walnuts. A swig of OJ. Feeling jonzy though. Rambling. What's going on? Jittery. Off schedule. Wanting Lunch. Want to go out. Decide to wait till tide receeds. Finally around 2 pm we bundle up. Its brutal outside. Driving wind, snow, snow pellets. 10-14" of snow. Giant Drifts forming. I want something sweet.

Staying present. Grab a cup of joe and settle into the computer. The wind is absolutely blowing. I love the power, the energy. The house is alive with kids and PT and cop tv and preparations for PT's sauce over pasta.